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Saturday, November 10, 2012

Paranoia? Or what exactly is this?

Ever get an unsettling feeling that something is just not right?

Ever have self doubt?

Ever wonder if you're in the right place regardless of the signs saying you are?


Well then. I can't welcome you to my world lately.

Yes, you have?

Well, welcome to my world!

When I'm at work, I triple count money and even then, I still wonder if I counted it correctly. When I don't triple count, I wonder for at least an hour if I gave the correct change. Even though the clock clearly shows the time, I wonder if it's right. Am I really closing up at the right time? Will someone lock me in the cooler? The bathroom? Is someone going to rob the store? Should I be suspicious?

The sign on the door clearly states that I'm at my doctor's office and they are open, but am I in the right place? Are they really open? I know I saw someone walk in, but does that really, truly mean that they are open? Do I really have an appointment? What if this is the wrong day? The wrong time? What if?

When I'm driving, am I going to the right place? Taking the right roads that I know by heart? And when I don't, is my GPS wrong? It has been wrong before, so why can't it be wrong now?

Even speaking betrays me. Did I say what I was supposed to say? Did I say what I was thinking? Am I on the right topic? Does it even make sense? What if I'm just jabbering hogwash?

This thing drives me bonkers! I do not like self doubt and that is what my this thing is all about. Some days it's not so bad, but others it's excruciating. Whatever this thing is, I wish it would just go away.

Thanks for listening.

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